6. I don’t want to be your mother.
Bringing up moms in conversation almost always results in unpleasant situations. Does he leave filthy plates on the table, damp towels on the bed, or worn socks in the shoe cabinet? Drag him gently through it a few times until he understands.
7. Is everything OK? You seem distant.
Your boyfriend would likely respond, “Everything’s OK,” to a generic query like that since many men struggle to express or share their emotions. He’ll only get defensive.
A better strategy is to consider what could be going on with him on your own and ask him some direct questions, such as: Is he stressed out about his job search? Introduce a more detailed discussion about what you believe the problem to be instead of an open-ended query, such as, “Hello, how did the resumes go today? There must be some positive news on the horizon.”
8. Never mind, I’ll do it myself.
This merely indicates that he is unable to complete the task. A guy may become resistant to change if this damages his ego. Maybe it might work if you asked, “Honey, could you help us with this. Although I am aware of your hectic schedule, I might need your professional assistance in this situation.
9. If you really loved me, you’d…
It seems like you’re giving them an ultimatum, which makes guys angry. Instead, you should make a positive request if you desire something from your spouse. Say something like, “I feel like I need more of your attention,” or “I’d want to go on vacation,” for instance. Can we come up with a plan? Always start these kinds of dialogues by expressing how you feel, then coming up with a solution as a team.
10. Leave me alone.
Men quickly feel unwelcome in the relationship when they hear this. Instead, try explaining to him that you need some time to resolve a problem. Usually, he’ll become receptive and make every effort to comprehend and uplift you.
11. We can’t afford that!
Even if buying a giant flat-screen TV might be out of your price range, being upset won’t solve the problem. Instead, take a deep breath, count to 10, and then voice your viewpoint. Say, “I’m pleased you’re so enthusiastic about the TV, but I’m scared we won’t have enough money to pay the mortgage this month,” for instance.
Your spouse will be more inclined to put their wallet away if you offer them the information. Then you might maybe respond, “But let’s find a way to cut back in other areas so that we can work toward that objective.” Your spouse won’t feel hopeless or isolated if you do it that way.
12. My mom’s coming to see us this weekend.
That immediately makes me think, “Oh bad, this weekend is going to be awful!” Try wording it as, “My mom’s coming to town, and we’re going to have a nice ladies’ day, but we’d really want you to meet us for dinner or have a drink with us!” rather than, “I want you to hang out with me and my mom all weekend!”
