4. Collaborate with other lone mothers.
It can be extremely lonely as you learn to negotiate your new role as a single parent. It can also be frightening and unpredictable. When that individual is in your shoes, it’s always preferable to have someone to confide in, lean on, and share your happy and stressful moments with.
There is absolutely no shame in occasionally asking another single mother to watch your children since she understands the struggle. She also understands that if she needs it, you’ll be there for her.
One of the best presents you can offer yourself while you adjust to your new role as a single parent is to look for others in your circumstances. Your predicament will be more understood by other single mothers than by anybody else. They’ll also be an excellent resource for guidance when you need it since you won’t have to go through the trouble of explaining everything to them.
5. Being imperfect is common.
Nobody is flawless. However, compared to other parents, single parents frequently experience pressure to do perfectly. It could be the long-standing stigma attached to being a single parent (though it is diminishing).
Your companion isn’t perfection. You are one person carrying out a task that requires two. That implies that mistakes will occasionally be made. You’ll need to decide what to prioritize. And occasionally, you’ll only manage to perform things just barely well enough.
In order to spend time with the kids or get to bed early for yourself, you may occasionally need to leave the dishes in the sink overnight. You could occasionally miss a kid’s function to go to work. Sometimes you’ll leave work early to attend your child’s performance or game.
You shouldn’t even try to be flawless because you can’t. Instead, make every attempt to produce your finest work and focus on the things that are most important right now.
6. Do not worry about criticism.
We never know how people will respond when we reveal something significant to the outside world, whether it be an engagement, a new baby, a new home, a new job, a serious illness, a separation, or a divorce. The commentary and feedback are typically highly favorable when it’s happy news, like a pregnancy announcement or a career advancement. But when a marriage ends, things can get really complicated.
There are many unfavorable misconceptions about being a single mother, but you must resist them if you want to succeed. Surprisingly, most of us do not adhere to those misunderstandings. We are strong, gorgeous, and hard-working women just trying to make the best of difficult circumstances.
According to studies, we frequently exaggerate how much and how negatively other people view us and our flaws. We are regrettably far more restrained and less spontaneous and joyous than we could be as a result of this.
7. Learn to say NO.
Mama, you must be a dependable and capable parent if you want both you and your children to succeed. If you’re not, all you’ll do is breed more chaos and small monsters in your environment.
This means we reject the idea of purchasing their love or absolving ourselves of our unjustified guilt by caving in to all of their demands. Allowing them to have a third cookie won’t change the reality that their father abandoned them.
They do not have authority. A YOU. They must respect you and you must respect them for a good home. We are not the parents from Disneyland. We are simply single parents who happen to be parents.
We’re not telling you to stop having fun with your kids or to stop showing them love, affection, and presents. We are for continuous discipline and appropriate expectations.