11. Family obligations.
How much time do you currently spend with your family, how much time do you anticipate spending with them after getting married and perhaps having children, and how much time do you anticipate your spouse spending with your family (and vice versa)?
What are your holiday plans and how will you ensure that both sets of family have an equal amount of time with you and your kids throughout the key holidays? Are you the kind of person who enjoys taking family vacations, and if so, how frequently?
You and your partner need to talk about the different types of holidays you prefer or don’t enjoy in addition to extended family vacations.
If you love Disneyland and your partner despises Mickey Mouse with a fiery passion, there can be some conflict. There may be a problem if one of you just enjoys camping while the other prefers staying in posh boutique hotels.
Similarly, if one person in your relationship is a workaholic who can’t stand being too far from the office while the other prefers to spend as little time at home as possible, you need to discuss how you’re going to compromise.
While you can’t expect to plan every vacation for the rest of your life together, talking over some options that you both approve of will help you prevent future conflict.
13. The name game.
What name will your family adopt? Will one partner adopt the other’s last name? And if not, what last name would you give to any future children?
How dedicated are you all to your careers? Do you work to live or do you live to work? What impact will your individual careers have on family life?
How far along are you in pursuing your “dream career”? Do you still have any coursework or internships to complete? If so, when do you plan to finish taking these actions to land the kind of work you want?
How much personal sacrifice will you have to make in order to advance in your chosen career?
15. TV in the bedroom: Yay! Or nay?
Consider the TV in your bedroom as a representation of your entire marriage. Would you rather safeguard the intimacy or have a means of escaping?
Although there is no right or wrong answer, answering the question for yourselves before you are married may provide you some important insight into how you envision your married life.