Because it hurts, people despise making excuses. It hurts because it forces them to confront who they truly are as individuals.
These days, with everyone’s every action made public on the Internet, we all have a lot more to apologize for. However, we haven’t actually become any more upset; all this indicates is that there have been more phony excuses offered. And we’ve begun to create some pretty standard methods for “apologizing” without actually doing so.
It may often be quite difficult to distinguish between an apology that is sincere and one that is not.
How can you tell when someone is not sincere in their apology? We have gathered information in this article that will assist you in this.
NON-APOLOGY APOLOGIES
1. I am sorry if …
This is a sincere apologies. The only thing it suggests is that something could have happened, which falls short of a genuine apology.
Examples: If I did anything wrong or upset you, please accept my sincere apologies.
2. I am sorry that you …
This apology involves passing the responsibility. It is in no way an apology. Instead, it makes you look like the issue.
Examples: I apologize that you were wounded, that you believe I done something wrong, and that you believe I am really horrible.
3. I am sorry but …
Nothing about this blaming apologies helps to mend the scars.
Examples: I apologize, but the majority of people wouldn’t have reacted as excessively as you did; in fact, several people found it amusing.
4. I was just …
This apology provides justification. It attempts to make the case that unpleasant action was acceptable since it was risk-free or justified.
Examples: I was merely joking, trying to be helpful, and attempting to calm you down.
5. I have already …
The implication in this deja-vu apology that there is nothing left to apologize for cheapens all that is said.
Examples: I already said I was sorry, I have apologized for that a million times.
6. I regret …
This avoidance of remorse links regret with making amends. No ownership exists. It doesn’t need you to confess you did anything wrong, which makes it a very helpful weapon in the inventory of the unapologetic person.
Examples: I regret you felt upset, I regret that mistakes were made.
7. I know I …
I’m trying to downplay what occurred without taking responsibility for any negative impact it may have had on you or other people. Although the whitewash appears self-effacing, it does not include an apology on its own.
Examples: I realize now that I should not have done it, that I probably should have gotten your permission beforehand, and that I occasionally act like a bull in a china shop.
8. You know I …
This “nothing to apologize for” apology makes suggestions that you shouldn’t be offended or tries to talk you out of them.
Examples: You know I am sorry, You know I didn’t mean that, You know I would never hurt you.
9. I will apologize if …
This pay-to-play apology is not a genuine, unreserved expression of regret. Instead, you must pay to obtain it.
Examples: I won’t say I’m sorry unless you do; I won’t say I’m sorry unless you promise never to bring it up again; and I won’t say I’m sorry unless you simply stop bringing it up.
10. I guess I …
This apology is fictitious. Although it implies that an apology is necessary, it never offers one.
Examples: I guess I owe you an apology, I guess I should say I am sorry.
11. X told me to apologize …
This is not my fault, I apologize. The offender claims that the only reason they are apologizing is at someone else’s request. It is implied that it would not have occurred in any other circumstance.
Examples: Your mother urged me to come make amends, and a friend advised me to do so.
12. Fine! Im sorry, okay!
This apology is bullying. Whether in tone or in words, you receive a grudging It doesn’t feel like an apology, yet I’m sorry. It could even seem dangerous.
Examples: Okay, enough already, I am sorry for chrissakes, Give me a break, I am sorry, alright?
